Tips on Technology

Cell Phone Etiquette
The Rules Withstand the Test of Time

by Richard K. Herrmann, Esquire

As I have mentioned on a number of occasions, in many instances Technology has passed us culturally. We need to apply and embrace the Technology but we have not been educated in its appropriate use. What may seem like common sense to many, is not even on the radar screen of others. Letís face it, some folks are simply oblivious to the world around them. As you can tell from the title of this piece, I am referring to the Cell Phone.

I will be the first to admit, “It is not the Cell Phone that annoys people, it is the user of the Cell Phone that annoys people.” In 1745, at the age of thirteen, George Washington learned the basic elements of politeness required of a lad of the times. His manuscript, Rules of Civility, has been edited and published by John T. Phillips, II. In the 4th Rule, George wrote:

“In the presence of others, sing not to yourself with a humming noise; nor drum with your fingers or feet.”

Without doubt, George should have added, “… nor should you converse with others on any cellular device.” [18th Century grammar added].

George Washington’s Rules of Civility are so compelling, I have taken the liberty to supplement them here:
111th: When partaking of victuals at any tavern or eatery, public or private, park your horse, your weapon and your cellular device with the keeper at the door.

Commentary: Horses may smell and be disorderly; and weapons will, no doubt, cause women to fear and eat unbalanced. The cell phone has the same tendency to ruin the proper flow of digestive juices of the user and those within ears’ proximity.

112th: When in public places, play not your horn without invitation. Nor should you permit any devices on your person to ring, toot or chime, other than your ancestry watch, the sound of which is expected and welcomed.

Commentary: Pollution of the ear is now the commonest of troubles and concerns as the Colonials urbanize in close proximity to one another. Human reaction to unwelcomed sounds can cause malaise, loss of sleep and ill moods. The introduction of the cell phone has increased the sensitivity of fellow citizens to this problem. Understandably, the Governor’s Guards require all such devices to be posited at the door before entering the Palace and being received.

113th: When traveling upon any public conveyance, whisper not, nor undertake any means of conversation on your cellular phone, to the exclusion of those about you.

Commentary: Causing those in close proximity to eavesdrop on your communications with others can lead to no good thing. At best, a gentleman or gentlewoman will attempt to avoid such discourtesies at all costs and will find it very disquieting to be compromised in this manner. At worst, the weaker set of our breed will find this an habitually enjoyable pastime and will have difficulty avoiding such indulgences in the future.

114th: Take not the reign of your horse in one hand and your cellular device in the other.

Commentary: No matter how well bred or trained, all of God’s creatures have their own way at one time or another. Your duty, when managing your movement, is on the safety of yourself and those about you. Stones and dips can come upon you quickly, requiring full attention and responsiveness. Those, who are better with numbers than I will tell you that a loss of a horse is more likely to occur if you are engaged in conversation remotely. It is of utmost importance that your mind is on the trail and that your hands are on your steed.

115th: Spit not on the floor, nor spittle on your cellular devise, lest others will get close to it and succumb to your maladies.

Commentary: The rural ways of men should be left behind and not be visited in the cities. Such vulgarities belong in prisons, galleys and rings for wrestling and other sports. This is particularly so when the means of portable communications are shared with the weaker sex.

And there it is. Whether we think of it in the parlance of the Greats or in the lingo of today, courtesy, safety and common sense need to be exercised. The Bar should set an example. We have the capacity. We have the obligation.

Return to February 2003 Table of Contents.